Times heals everything. Give it time. Every time you have been down and out about an instance in your life, you are told to give it time, or that this too shall pass. But what is that really passes? The pain or time? We are made to believe that pain will fade away with time, but it never really does, you just learn to live with it, in that so called time that was supposed to heal you.

So once you learn to live with pain, the external world, blissfully unaware of your well-rehearsed act, begins to think you have recovered, or made progress, and continues to inflict you with more wounds thinking you can take it, well because you recovered remember? It’s funny how focused we can be internally, yet not realize what thought processes and pieces of ourselves do we need to disentangle, for our own peace of mind, and for our much needed progress out of the hole that we have created for ourselves, where we find solace, comfort and a non-existent will to carry on.

We speak so much about how we are not doing well, that we begin to live with that and drill it deep in mind that we aren’t doing well and convince ourselves that we will in fact never do well, not realizing that change is in fact the only constant, and nothing about that scenario is the same except our undeterred will to dwell in despair, because that despair feels more safe and worthy of our time than taking a chance at something that might help us heal and prepare for whatever challenges lie ahead, because that’s what life is, challenges, one after the other. You solve one puzzle, and the next one is waiting in line, geared up to take up your time and peace of mind.

When we don’t tie in the loose ends for ourselves, the possibility of tripping over after every little stumble increases multi-fold. We keep tripping, over and over again and become so accustomed to it that we believe that to be the way of life, blinding ourselves to the chances that could get us out, for our own good. So you do nothing about it, learn to live with the pain, and accept that as a way of life, until another shock comes your way tripping you over yet again.

So what is recovery then? Living with the pain or recognizing that you can detach from the ghosts of your past? Is recovery about the past or the present or about the future? From what it seems, recovery is a myth. The ghosts of your past linger on, you learn to live with it, and the future? Why worry about the future, when you know with your choice and way of life…

A relapse is around the corner!

Photo by boram kim on Unsplash